For those who don't feel
by onion.sun
Summary: A little rewrite on the 'Descent' showing a different sort of interaction between Damon and his victim - Jessica. R


Jessica was waiting for the end of her life to begin. It would be like a film roll that would slowly unravel and show a great big nothing. Her life hadn't been very eventful, so to speak, until now.

'Please don't, please...' she begged, her vision almost grey from her tears.

'And yet, should I kill you or let you live? Should I give into my 'feelings'? the green-eyed man yelled in her face.

'No, please, don't kill me. I won't tell anyone, I swear...'

'Because on the one hand, you have human feelings. They should make me feel pity towards you. On the other hand, there are other feelings that don't need me to be human. There's rage and fear and lust and hate – '

'Th-those are still human,' Jessica replied meekly.

'What did you say?' he asked harshly.

'You're human,' she repeated, her voice cracking into several desperate sounds. 'You're _very_ human...'

The man's eyes were wet with fresh tears and his face was contorted with grief.

'Why do you think I am a filthy, wretched human? You think I'm that pathetic?'

'N-no...'

'So why then blondie? Tell me.'

'Because y-you, you...' she began, crying again. 'You're suffering.'

The man laughed bitterly.

'That's rich. You're begging for your life but you're trying to sympathize with my pain.'

'No, I just...I just see it,' Jessica mumbled into her tears.

'Where do you see it? Does my face show it?' he yelled, coming closer towards her.

Jessica had nowhere to go. She was glued to the spot.

The man grabbed her chin and forced her to look at him.

'Does it?'

'No.'

'Answer me truthfully!'

'I...'

'Just say it!'

'No...'

'I will make you regret your silence!'

'It does!' Jessica half-yelled, frightened. 'It does so much. It's unbearable. I hate looking at it. Please, I feel even closer to death when I look at it.'

The man smiled ruefully and said:

'That's right. Cuz you're human. You know what a silent death means. You know you must fear it. I don't – I can't make myself fear it. And I'd want nothing more than to get the fuck out of town and leave them behind because they're all keeping me back. I _need_ to hunt and tear, I need to feel something else!'

'Is that why – why you were in the middle of the road?' Jessica asked, her tears touching her lips. 'Did you want to die?'

'No. I was hoping I'd be human again,' he whispered.

'Wh-what?'

'They don't know, they refuse to see it. I refuse to see it. But you know, Jessica, you can't just make it go away when you want it so badly. It keeps coming back because you will it. And isn't it so much better when you have to fucking hide it all the time?'

'Why do you have to hide it?' Jessica asked, for the sake of asking.

'Because, Jessica! Have you not been listening? Because they would tear me apart, just like I'm going to tear you.'

'My death wouldn't make you feel any better, please! I implore you! Think of what you're doing!'

'I can't think, Jessica...' he muttered and leant his forehead into her hair. 'I really can't. Don't ask me to do that.'

'Then, then...feel for me. Feel pity and remorse,' she stammered, her breath running down her throat like stones.

'You shouldn't say those things. You shouldn't be here...' he said darkly.

'I'm so-sorry I crossed your path,' she whispered softly.

'You were trying to be kind. You know now where kindness gets you,' he told her.

Jessica's lips trembled as she tried opening them to form a sentence. A simple, short sentence. It was too bad she couldn't say it.

_You're wrong. _

She closed her eyes tightly and started praying silently.

The man smiled to himself and pulled her to him. He couldn't compel her to walk freely again because she had shut her eyes.

He pressed a soft kiss to her forehead.

She began shaking even harder. Was this a kiss goodbye?

His breath, a very cold and ghostly one, hit her eyes and opened them to the nightly sky.

She was alone, in the middle of the road, lying on her back.

She was watching the stars.

They were beautiful and bright and they were reflected in her eyes.

Her body felt warm and bruised. She got up on her elbows and saw an empty bottle next to her right leg.

The man had vanished.


End file.
